Hospice takes care of people the doctors are having a difficult time fixing; people the doctors probably can’t fix. What does hospice do? Hospice helps people live with the greatest possible comfort during the limited time they have left.
It is interesting that a person who can’t be fixed, who is approaching death through disease, looks very sick and often frail in the months before their death BUT they don’t look like they are dying or at least match our idea of what a person looks like. They have probably entered the dying process in those prior months but they don’t look like they are going to die. It is only in the one to three weeks before death, that a person who is dying from a disease actually looks like they are dying.
People are generally referred to hospice in the last weeks of their life, which is way too late to help the patient and is often just crisis solving with the family.
What do you say to someone to get them to accept hospice? Well, one thing to say after explaining the services hospice offers is to ask what they think will happen if they get on hospice too soon? The answer is really a good thing—the person gets discharged from the hospice program. They have stabilized or gotten better and no longer need the guidance that hospice offers. Great! And that does happen. Not a lot, but it does happen.
Getting on the hospice program when a person’s condition is deteriorating in spite of all the treatment that is being given or has been done is accepting a different kind of medical help. It is not saying I have given up hope. It is not implying that I am dying tomorrow or next week but it is getting help that centers around family, the significant people in our circle of life that are affected. It is accepting help for ourselves as we face life with illness, often accompanied by pain, fear, and eventually death.
What is scary about that? The scary part is that everyone has to admit, on paper, that there isn’t going to be the cure everyone was praying for. People have to face the realities of life — everyone dies. Fortunately, hospice services can support and guide everyone during that scary time. Knowledge and companionship reduce fear. Hospice helps reduce the fear we all bring to end of life decisions. It takes courage to face reality and we can face reality best when we have all the facts and are not alone.
Something more about… When Treatment Stops Working: What Hospice Really Offers
This blog is about recognizing the signs of decline, the emotional and practical value of early hospice, and the fear that surrounds these transitions. The Approaching Death Support Kit includes Gone From My Sight and By Your Side, both essential for families and agencies seeking proactive education and support.
